Little Girl

by Rachel Byron-Law

Genre: Folk


Little girl
barely big enough to see
out the window
as the car pulls away down the street
but old enough
to know she’ll have to act carefully
if she don’t want her Mama to leave her again

But I was just a little girl
crying for her Mama
how could you leave your little girl
for the arms of another?
I still recall that little girl
not knowing how to be
angry at the one
she was missing every day

But you were a mess
your sister passed, then your father, too
your Tarot card readings conflicted
as you wondered if a God in Heaven loved you
and you wondered how
with a husband and a child
you could still feel so wildly alone?

But you were just a little girl
trembling on the inside
a scared and wondering little girl
without the strength to find
a way to love that little girl
with all her hopes, and dreams and fears
wanting a life that wasn’t hers

And so, years passed
summer became our season
for corn husk dolls
growing seeds, and belief free from reason
and so I grew older
in not one, but two families
seeing what it can mean to be in love

Maybe one day I’ll have a little girl
and I will be her Mama
and we will love that little girl
the best way we know how to
and I will teach my little girl
that life means making mistakes every day
and learning that God loves us, anyway

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